While reading Aanchal Malhotra’s book Remains of the partition Last night I read chapter after chapter of stories from people who lived through Partition, which often give us an insight into the fear and violence that women suffered during Partition. Survivors of that time vividly describe the atrocities and harassment that women suffered on both sides of the border. In one story, an older woman recalls how all the women in her family were supposed to carry small pocket knives with the instruction “sea yes sea yes“—either you die or you defend your honour.” In another chapter, a man recounts how, during the riots, some families killed their own women to protect them from being attacked. It is heartbreaking to read about families who believed they had no choice but to take the lives of their daughters, sisters and wives to save them from a fate they considered worse than death. And indeed it is!
All this made me think of the Calcutta rape victim. A woman’s honour was, is and always will be important, but can we also give our girls knives and say: “Sea, sea …!” after the horrific incident; the incident that has left us all with nothing but disgust and resentment. Whether it is 1947 or 2024, a woman’s honour has always been a fragile thing, fiercely protected but easily destroyed by a society that still tends to blame the victim.
Of Nirbhaya And now, after the recent tragic incident in Kolkata, one still finds people offering “advice” to women to escape such a fate, asking them to cover up, avoid “turning men on” or justifying that it is not always a man’s fault. These messages put the entire responsibility for safety on women themselves. Celina Jaitley She shared memories from her childhood where she was blamed for receiving unwanted attention from men, whether it was for her short skirts or for having the audacity to ride a horse. scooter It is frustrating that these people fail to see the real problem: the problem lies with men who cannot control their actions. The horrific details of the assault on the Calcutta doctor are chilling, and when her suffering is overshadowed by such advice, it is truly painful.
But can we, in the face of such atrocities, hand knives to our daughters and say to them: “Sea, sea …How did they do it during Partition? Can we ask them to take such an extreme measure in a world that should be safeguarding their rights and dignity? The very thought is disturbing, but it reflects our collective desperation. Headline after headline about rape leaves us with a deep sense of disgust and helplessness.
While stories from the Partition era are a stark reminder of the lengths families went to protect their women, they also highlight society’s failure to protect them in the first place. So we must ask ourselves: how far have we really come, and what can we do to ensure that no woman has to face the brutality of another man’s lack of self-control, desire for power or unbridled instincts?
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